I think therefore I am, but, that is only true when I feel what I am. When did I become a patient? I have no memory of the moment. Two nurses told me that I was scheduled for another evaluation today and reassured me that this one was going to be different because now I knew how to behave. They told me that I should not forget the reminder that they were forced to give me yesterday when I asked the head psychiatrist what they thought about madness and if they were willing to take the same tests and evaluations that I was being submitted to.

The psychiatrist told me that I was an intelligent person and that It was strange and frustrating that I continued to insist that madness did not exist in society. "Did you forget where you are?" I didn't notice that the psychiatrist had directed this question towards me. Nonsense was translated into sense and my sense of being revealed a gaze. It was a gaze that had been modified and fine tuned to break down a person's own individual capacities and sense of self. I did not know where I was exactly, but, I did know that their gaze was consuming, dissecting and studying my gender, class, and race at the same time that they were all being erased. Wait. Give me a second. I need to question what I have learned. I need to feel what I am.