…..then they handed me an element that seemed to be a stone in fluid form and said:

  “if philosophers only knew how to mine the gray matter...the electric essence”

Today I had a dream.

I dreamt that for the first time I saw everything for what it was.

I saw familiar faces. I knew exactly where I was and the pain in my chest was no longer unknown.

My brother was there watching me, but he couldn’t reach out to help me

because he knew that I had to do this on my own.

“What is: this? What do you mean by: this? What did you have to do?”

I’m not sure.

The faces that were there said, “This is the way to break somebody down.”

They said that the body would seem fine but that after a while

the mind would weaken-breakdown and the person would fall asleep

but still function as if they were awake.

The mind will always feel like sleeping and be careless and unresponsive

to the past, present, future….simulated...manipulated…..un...alter...able….

The game for my breakdown began.

I saw the palpitation of the soul

its circuitry was unknown to me

and you, yes, you, attempted to grasp and suffocate it with your desperate hands.

I told you to

let it go-

let it go astray to where it came from

there is no need to control it

let it go.

You held on as my eyes opened and I heard these last words

before the dream was suffocated:

I know that I hurt you deeply

and I know that I let you down

if I say that I love you

know that it is not because

I lost something that I have found